positive words

4 Words That Changed My Life - Day 14 #31DaysOfBlogging

I want to tell you about 4 words that changed my life.

They are not magical words, and you don’t need to jump on one foot and spin around while saying them. LOL. But, I do think the words have some sort of magic sprinkled within them.

Here’s the thing about these words. When I started saying them, they were not true.

They held no meaning. It almost felt like I was lying because I wanted them to be true. I actually desperately wanted them to be true, but when I first started saying them, they were not.

Flash forward about 19 months and I can say that they are ABSOLUTELY true and they’ve literally changed my life.

So you’re probably asking, “WHAT ARE THE WORDS, KATE??”

Have you seen people on Instagram put the caption “I love my life.” I swear I kept seeing it everywhere and each time I saw it I would roll my eyes. See, I was in a season where I was low. It was a year after being fired and my life felt like it was legitimately falling apart before my very eyes. Security felt like a pipe dream. I felt like I was losing everything…even my own voice.

I questioned my talent to sing and my ability to write. Blogging scared me. See, I had written a blog that felt like it had blown up my whole life. So anytime I went to write, the traumatic experience was triggered.

So there I was, minding my own business, silently judging people who posted that they loved their life. And I felt this inner struggle. This pull. I wanted to love my life. I had in the past and I wanted it back. I talk to God all the time. God is my higher power and it’s sort of something I do: talk to God.

I was talking to God about how I wanted to love my life, but I had a laundry list of things He needed to change for me in order for me to say that I loved my life. So, there I was, telling God what was up, and I felt like I heard God say (not out loud, but just in my spirit)…I felt like He was saying: “I want you to start saying that you love your life. Right now. Before anything changes.”

And I was like….whuuuuuuuut? Ummm no. It’s not true. I don’t love my life. Have you not heard my laundry list of requests? The things I need you to change? Once those things are in order….THEN, I can say I love my life. So, get to it God. Thanks yo.

And again, I felt it so strongly in my spirit. “I need you to start saying that you love your life…now….I need you to say it like you believe it. Like it’s true.“

I thought it was sort of ridiculous, but I decided to listen. The next morning, laying in my bed — before I checked my phone or did anything else — I looked at my ceiling fan spinning and said out loud:

“I LOVE MY LIFE. Thanks, God, for another day.”

You guys. These 4 words changed my life:

I LOVE MY LIFE.

I don’t even know how to explain it or quantify it for you…but things started to shift. Things I had wanted to see happen, suddenly started happening. Areas in my life that I felt were deserts all of sudden felt like there was water flowing.

I challenge you today, if you are needing a change…a boost, start your day by saying these four words: I LOVE MY LIFE. Say it in the face of what seems like untruth. Say it over and over again.

I still, to this day, say those words out loud at the beginning of each day. I am going to tell you more about the details of what transpired in a couple weeks…stay tuned to the blog…but I want you to know that sometimes you have to start speaking things out. Declare them. Use your words to shape your life. To transform your life.

Even if it’s not true right now, I get it. It wasn’t true for me either. But, I believe words have power and they can change things. Give it a try. You might just be surprised.
To hear more about this idea of these four words on our podcast, listen to this episode: Can 4 Words Change Your Life?

YOU can change your life. Start with your words.

LOVE YOU LIKE WOAH.

Kate

"Year Of Yes" Book Review

We both just finished listening to the audiobook “Year of Yes” by Shonda Rhimes. It was great! Definitely give it a read (or listen) if you are needing a new book suggestion. Shonda is the mastermind behind little TV shows you may have heard of...*cough, cough* 'Grey's Anatomy," "Private Practice," "Scandal," and "How To Get Away With Murder."

For those of you who haven’t read it, (I promise not give away any spoilers) it’s her story about saying YES for a whole year.  The title told you that much, right? Here’s what I loved about her story: saying “yes” was her taking action. It was her showing up. It was doing and not just dreaming.

She talks about the difference between “doers” and “dreamers” and how people out there who are accomplishing things and taking the world by storm are not merely dreamers...they are out there DOING.

It’s an action word. Here’s the thing for me. I am a dreamer. I have been my whole life. There is always something playing out in my head. It’s often grand and whimsical...but I love dreaming. Give me a glass of wine, some soul-stirring jams in my ears and an airplane window seat...that’s pretty much dream heaven. I think dreams lay the groundwork for doing...but if you only dream and don’t do, you will probably not go very far. I have a printed out (non-final) bucket list in my office. I actually believe that one person can change the world with a simple idea. I really did dream about marrying Prince William. True story. I dreamt about it. I thought it could happen. Yes, that’s a silly teenage fairytale dream...but as a teen I also dreamt about standing on a stage in front of thousands of people singing my songs.

Here’s the difference. I took no action on hunting Prince WIlliam down and forcing him to marry me. I did however take steps in writing songs, performing, singing in front of people, etc. And today you can find me singing on a stage and not married to Prince Charming. (On a side-note, can you believe he married a different Kate??? I mean come on… my name is Katherine Elizabeth...I’m practically made shoe-in for the royal family. Haha!)

I love Shonda’s approach to being unapologetically who she is and how saying yes changed her life. I love how a simple 3 letter word shook her up and out of her routine. Never underestimate what a YES can do. Saying yes has been transformational for Jill and me too. We write about it in more detail in our Inspired eBook...and we challenge the reader to say yes when their normal gut instinct would be to say no.

Last weekend a friend invited us over to their house because some family was in town. It was 11:30pm...I could either say no, and go to bed at a decent hour, or I could say a YES and get in an uber at midnight because why not. So I did. I left my house at 12:04am and for a brief moment had flashbacks of being 23 again. But, I’m so glad that I did! I had such a fun night and even though I didn’t go to bed until 4:30AM (what the what?) I made memories that will last. I laughed hard. And being tired the next day wasn’t so bad. I had shown up. Said yes.

This was last summer and a friend included temporary tattoo's in her book launch package. I put that YES right on my arm and loved every single time I saw it. 

This was last summer and a friend included temporary tattoo's in her book launch package. I put that YES right on my arm and loved every single time I saw it. 

So, thanks, Shonda, for telling your story...when people share stories, it’s what gives us comfort and strength in our own storytelling. Thanks for being vulnerable and for taking us along on your journey.  Thanks for reminding us to show up, say yes and to love ourselves. By telling your story, you remind us to keep telling ours. Loneliness is the worst disease and by sharing stories we fight that disease.  Keep on with your badassery.


Much love,

Kate

PS. I have officially started using badassery and am forever in your debt for creating the word.

 

 

Pep Talks #31Days2016

Recently, I needed a pep talk. I didn’t know I needed one. I was having one of those days…and my bestie saw it. You know when people know you well and they can see what’s going on in your head sometimes before you can see it? It’s a strange and wonderful thing all at the same time. So, I as having one of these days and it was 4:30PM and getting DARK (insert eye roll here…the early sunset time kills me. womp womp) and she gave me a pep talk like no other pep talk. It was the mother of all pep talks. It was like a straight 10 minutes of telling me the truth of my life. 

It was weird because if I’m being honest, I like giving pep talks. It’s easy for me to see the truth in other people and tell them exactly what I see in them. I love reminding people of the greatness within them. It’s easy for me to see the beauty, depth and wonder in others. But, sometimes it’s harder for me to do to myself (which I think is pretty normal-thank God.) That’s why it was so helpful to have her words. 

Guys, our words are SO IMPORTANT. They can help people. You, with your words, have the power to help someone. Tell people who they are. As our dear friend Bob says, “Tell people who they’re becoming.” If they’re stuck in a rut, tell them how you see their future unfolding. Tell them they are loved. Tell them they are valued. YOU GUYS. It’s so basic but if we all opened our mouths and used our words for good a little more often…maybe there would be less pain. Maybe there would be less loneliness. And it doesn’t have to be a 10 minutes mother of all pep talks…a simple 9 word text will do. “Hey! You’re such a valuable part of our community!” or even 6 words: “Keep going! I believe in you!” And sometimes it’s just helpful to check in with people. “Hey! How are you?"

I was feeling in such a cloud before that pep talk Jill gave me. I was wallowing and low…and after that pep talk I felt SO MUCH BETTER. My spirits were lifted…I literally got off the couch and went and ran 4 miles. I’m telling you guys: IT WAS THAT GOOD. Hahaaha…and I did it because Jill told me I could…there is a giant hill that if I ran I told her I wouldn't be able to run up it…and she very matter of factly said, “Yes you can.” And you know what…when I was running…I ran up that damn giant of a hill because someone thought I could. It sounds ridiculous but it’s so true. Our words have power. 

As I ran, I had one glimmer of a realization. By the time I was done with my run it was almost completely pitch black. I looked up at the sky and realized I could see a TON of stars. It was barely 6pm and the sky was bright with twinkly lights. This little voice inside me was all of a sudden thankful for the early sunset because it gave me more time with the stars. See, I LOVE the stars. I l could sit and stare at the night sky for HOURS and be completely content. So, there was a bonus I found in the early sunset…a positive spin on the early darkness. 

So, I got back that night, thankful for a best friend who could speak positive things over my life. Thankful for the body I’ve been given..that I have the ability to run. And thankful for words. Let’s use them, guys. 

And let me be the one to say this to you, the reader, if you are needing some sort of encouragement today. You are awesome and you are so valuable. You have an important role in your community and you are capable of INCREDIBLE things. If you are reading this, thank you. Thank you for valuing our words on these blogs and the songs that we share. Thank you for the times that you’ve tweeted/FB’ed/Snapped/showed up at shows….you are a gift to us. And even if you feel like no one cares about you, you are wrong. We do. We are all in this together and hope that you KNOW that you are loved, valued and appreciated. You are capable of greatness. 

With much love,
-Kate

Daniel...what a gem. Not sure what city this was in but we love that we have this memory!

Daniel...what a gem. Not sure what city this was in but we love that we have this memory!

Group shot with so many fabulous ladies in Chicago!

Group shot with so many fabulous ladies in Chicago!

With Abby after our Heart Of Stone release show in Nashville! She's the best!

With Abby after our Heart Of Stone release show in Nashville! She's the best!

Miriam...(was this in the ATL?) She's loyal, encouraging...we just adore her! 

Miriam...(was this in the ATL?) She's loyal, encouraging...we just adore her!