Holidays

LAUGH! - Day 18 #31DaysOfBlogging

What’s better than wine, friends, and laughter? It’s like the trifecta of awesome. We got the chance to go to Napa in April with two of our closest friends, Whitney and Jess. We went to dream up some ideas….more on that soon.

(We are working on putting together a retreat for YOU to come to where we dream, laugh, drink wine, and get inspired. Can’t wait to share more of this with you. )

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Another thing we got to do while we were in Napa for this trip was to go see our favorite comedian, Kathleen Madigan. We’ve learned that laughter truly CHANGES things. There’s a reason why it is said that it’s the best medicine. We believe it. We take any chance we get to laugh. We were so stoked that Kathleen happened to have a show in Napa while we were there! Her show was amazing, as always, and if you ever get the chance to see her LIVE, go!

Life can get so serious. All of us humans are under a lot of pressure to perform, provide, do, do, do all the time. Sometimes you need to escape the pressure and just laugh. Life is funny, after all. It’s not all serious.

As you head home for the holidays, or to in-laws, or whatever you may be doing, make sure to add laughter to the mix. Play some funny games, drink some wine, and watch these Kathleen Madigan specials on Netflix. The whole fam will love them!

  Bothering Jesus

Bothering Jesus

 Madigan Again

Madigan Again

Tomorrow the blog is all about answering your burning questions about if we’ve been dating on the walkabout. Hint hint…we have! And we’ve got stories for you!

Much love,

J&K

These Are A Few Of Our Favorite Things - Day 17 #31DaysOfBlogging

One time we wrote a song called “Things I Like.” You can hear it on our Songs on the 17th album. We love sharing with you guys some of the things we like/love, whether it’s food, books, places, TV shows, or other people.

We did a whole episode about this on our podcast called These Are A Few Of Our Favorite Things.


You can listen to it to hear more about why we love all these things, but here are links to all the things we talked about in this episode. Maybe you need to do some last minute Christmas shopping?? US TOO. Hopefully this will give you some ideas!

CLOTHES AND SHOPPING

Carly Jean Los Angeles

The Shop Forward (they donate a portion of all sales to different charities and make the famous #4ThingsTote bags and our most favorite #hallmark sweatshirts —see below and you have until TODAY (12/17) at 2PM CST to get your Christmas orders in!)

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BOOKS/ MUSIC/APPS

You Are A Badass

Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine

Sigrid

Troublemaker by Leah Remini

Calm App

Plested

FOOD/DRINK

Kale & Mozzarella Chicken Burgers

SweetLeaf Sweet Drops

TV SHOWS

Happy Valley

Broadchurch

Young And Hungry

SKIN CARE

Anti Bump Solution (if you struggle with cystic acne — this will save your life.)

Weightless Protection SPF (looking for a daily SPF moisturizer that won’t make you break-out? this is it!)

Triple Berry Smoothing Peel

Tomorrow we are going to tell you about our #1 mood booster…true story.

See you tomorrow.

J&K

A Birthday Poem For Kate - Day 16 #31DaysOfBlogging

Guys, it’s KATE’S BIRTHDAY! Instead of writing a plain old blog all about the wonder that is “Kate the Great Rapier,” I decided to write a little poem instead. Send her tons of love today! -Jill

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This poem is all about Kate 

Who is a wondrous gift to this earth

Today is a special date

Today is the day of her birth


She prefers her eggs without yolks

And loves to do handstands all over

She laughs at her very own jokes

And is a gift to all who know her

She harmonizes like no other

And she's really one heck of a writer

She's mostly brave, except one thing 

She’s terrified of spiders


Red, white, or even rosé

Kate will drink wine on any day

But don't forget, she has another passion

Her feelings are deep for a classic old fashioned


Cheese plates are her favorite

And gummy candies too

She loves to take pictures, and if you're in need

She'll take a picture for you

The water is her favorite

But she loves mountains too

She's famous for her eyeliner

And lives on dry shampoo


She'll make you a meal or give you a ride

Her generosity is on fire

She's vibrant, positive, and fully alive

Her gift is to inspire

So here's the thing I'd like you to do

If you happen to have just a minute

Tell Kate that the world is a better place 

Simply because she's in it!

#HandsDownExcited - Day 15 #31DaysofBlogging

In honor of Kate’s birthday coming up tomorrow, we would like to present to you this very special edition of #31DaysofBlogging featuring Kate doing handstands in all the places we’ve visited this past year.

Okay, maybe not ALL the places, but she has really gotten great at these handstands, and it’s been so fun documenting them all across the country/world. It has become sort of a weird J&K tradition to do these. You already know we love jumping pics, but the Kate handstand might be our next favorite!

Also, props to Jill for snapping these shots. We really try to be a team in every way, you guys. HAHA! Check it out!

 Santa Monica, CA

Santa Monica, CA

 Carlton Landing, OK

Carlton Landing, OK

 Basalt, CO

Basalt, CO

 Aspen, CO

Aspen, CO

 Toronto, Canada

Toronto, Canada

 Rye, NH

Rye, NH

 Reyjkavik, Iceland

Reyjkavik, Iceland

 Portsmouth, NH

Portsmouth, NH

 Iceland

Iceland

 Iceland

Iceland

 Iceland

Iceland

 New Hampshire

New Hampshire

 Iceland

Iceland

 Marco Island, FL

Marco Island, FL

 Rosemary Beach, FL

Rosemary Beach, FL

 Rosemary Beach, FL

Rosemary Beach, FL

 Rosemary Beach, FL (with a little help from my friend!)

Rosemary Beach, FL (with a little help from my friend!)

 Rosemary Beach, FL (nailed it)

Rosemary Beach, FL (nailed it)

 Iceland

Iceland

Pretty cool, right? Thanks for coming along on this 31 Days of Blogging journey with us….we are just about halfway through! More fun stories and thoughts to come this month, and tomorrow we’ll be celebrating Kate with a special birthday edition!

J&K

PS. Our friend Jess came up with the hashtag #handsdownexcited and we need to start using it!

4 Words That Changed My Life - Day 14 #31DaysOfBlogging

I want to tell you about 4 words that changed my life.

They are not magical words, and you don’t need to jump on one foot and spin around while saying them. LOL. But, I do think the words have some sort of magic sprinkled within them.

Here’s the thing about these words. When I started saying them, they were not true.

They held no meaning. It almost felt like I was lying because I wanted them to be true. I actually desperately wanted them to be true, but when I first started saying them, they were not.

Flash forward about 19 months and I can say that they are ABSOLUTELY true and they’ve literally changed my life.

So you’re probably asking, “WHAT ARE THE WORDS, KATE??”

Have you seen people on Instagram put the caption “I love my life.” I swear I kept seeing it everywhere and each time I saw it I would roll my eyes. See, I was in a season where I was low. It was a year after being fired and my life felt like it was legitimately falling apart before my very eyes. Security felt like a pipe dream. I felt like I was losing everything…even my own voice.

I questioned my talent to sing and my ability to write. Blogging scared me. See, I had written a blog that felt like it had blown up my whole life. So anytime I went to write, the traumatic experience was triggered.

So there I was, minding my own business, silently judging people who posted that they loved their life. And I felt this inner struggle. This pull. I wanted to love my life. I had in the past and I wanted it back. I talk to God all the time. God is my higher power and it’s sort of something I do: talk to God.

I was talking to God about how I wanted to love my life, but I had a laundry list of things He needed to change for me in order for me to say that I loved my life. So, there I was, telling God what was up, and I felt like I heard God say (not out loud, but just in my spirit)…I felt like He was saying: “I want you to start saying that you love your life. Right now. Before anything changes.”

And I was like….whuuuuuuuut? Ummm no. It’s not true. I don’t love my life. Have you not heard my laundry list of requests? The things I need you to change? Once those things are in order….THEN, I can say I love my life. So, get to it God. Thanks yo.

And again, I felt it so strongly in my spirit. “I need you to start saying that you love your life…now….I need you to say it like you believe it. Like it’s true.“

I thought it was sort of ridiculous, but I decided to listen. The next morning, laying in my bed — before I checked my phone or did anything else — I looked at my ceiling fan spinning and said out loud:

“I LOVE MY LIFE. Thanks, God, for another day.”

You guys. These 4 words changed my life:

I LOVE MY LIFE.

I don’t even know how to explain it or quantify it for you…but things started to shift. Things I had wanted to see happen, suddenly started happening. Areas in my life that I felt were deserts all of sudden felt like there was water flowing.

I challenge you today, if you are needing a change…a boost, start your day by saying these four words: I LOVE MY LIFE. Say it in the face of what seems like untruth. Say it over and over again.

I still, to this day, say those words out loud at the beginning of each day. I am going to tell you more about the details of what transpired in a couple weeks…stay tuned to the blog…but I want you to know that sometimes you have to start speaking things out. Declare them. Use your words to shape your life. To transform your life.

Even if it’s not true right now, I get it. It wasn’t true for me either. But, I believe words have power and they can change things. Give it a try. You might just be surprised.
To hear more about this idea of these four words on our podcast, listen to this episode: Can 4 Words Change Your Life?

YOU can change your life. Start with your words.

LOVE YOU LIKE WOAH.

Kate

JLo or Bust? - Day 13 #31DaysOfBlogging

One of the awesome things about the walkabout this year was being able to randomly just decide to go wherever we felt like going. We were over at our friend Betsy’s house one day and somehow started talking about the wonder that is JLo.

Yes, Jenny from the block. Jennifer Lopez.

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Who knows how she came up in our conversation, but one thing led to another and before long, we were on her website checking out her tour dates in Vegas.

Lo” and behold, (get it?) there were only a handful of shows left....we decided we couldn’t miss this, and so we picked a date, bought our tickets, and booked our trips to Vegas for the end of April.

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Now, JLo was what really prompted us to go, and we danced away to Let’s Get Loud and Waiting For Tonight, but we ended up doing so much more. We stayed at an AMAZING hotel called The Palazzo. The hotel is incredible, and really you never even have to leave. There are about a billion restaurants, amazing pools, and of course plenty of gambling. (You WANT to stay at this hotel...book a room at Suiteness.com, the best place to book all kinds of amazing suites!)

Gambling is one of those things that is either super fun or super depressing. See, when you’re winning, it’s the best feeling ever. It’s thrilling. The sound of a slot machine ching-ching-chinging when you hit the jackpot, or the feeling of those chips in your hand when you beat the blackjack dealer. It’s INVIGORATING.

But when you’re losing, it’s the worst. You start to really hate the fact that you got sucked into this to begin with. You see people around you winning, try to lurk near their winning machines (like the lurker in FRIENDS, remember her?), and start to question your whole life.

Life can be like this sometimes. There are ups and downs. There are times when you’re winning and times when you’re losing. There are times when you’re just breaking even and it’s fun just to play. We actually learned a lot from our trip to Vegas, which we talk more about here in this podcast episode, Gambling and Taking Breaks.

A little piece of encouragement for you today:

It’s okay to take a break sometimes. There are times where you get spontaneous and book the JLo tickets, and there are times when you need to just lie on your couch and binge F-R-I-E-N-D-S and eat nachos. Both are fine. Balance is important. So whatever that is for you today, find the balance you need in your life. And if you go to Vegas, put $20 on black 17 for us.

Until tomorrow, best of luck to you…and may you find the balance you need.

J&K

PS. Just in case you were hungry — this will make you more hungry — some of the yummy food we ate while in Vegas! YES PLEASE. Here for it.

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After The Aftermath - Day 12 #31DaysOfBlogging

A few years ago, we posted a blog around this time called “The Aftermath.” We posted it because earlier that year we had posted a blog that led to us being fired from a male country artist’s tour.

As you can imagine, it was not a fun time in life. We had taken the blog down in May of that year and we decided to re-post it in December during our #31DaysofBlogging. We hadn’t been able to fully talk about why we took the blog down or some of the things that had gone on throughout the year, and so we re-posted the original blog, “When Someone Calls You Huge” and then the next day, we posted “The Aftermath” blog. We really like to be honest on here, and well, it was as honest as we could get. And you guys. The response to those two blogs was crazy. Crazy awesome.

A bunch of people reached out to us and wanted to talk about what had happened. Even the Washington Post reached out to do an interview. This was about 2 years prior to the #metoo movement taking off, so it felt like we were stepping into extremely unknown territory.

People told us not to talk about it. People said it would ruin our career if we told our story.

But we couldn’t not talk about it, because we really believe that stories and truth-telling ARE WHAT CHANGE THE WORLD. We knew that if we had this experience — a really shitty one by the way— that it wasn’t just about us anymore. It felt so unfair, so unjust. But with the help of dear friends who were our sounding board— we really realized that this situation had not happened just for us. It happened to us so that we could help anyone else who may be experiencing the same thing….Because sharing our stories will hopefully make someone else in the same situation feel less alone in their own.

Since then, we’ve been able to speak to groups of women about speaking your truth even when it costs you something. It’s been an incredible thing to see something that felt so dark and hard be used for something good.

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Literally, we have met so many wonderful people because of it. We’ve begun working on a book. We started a podcast about “What to do when life doesn’t go the way you planned it.” The experience was traumatic and awful and we hope to never walk through another season like that. BUT, we’re grateful for it. We’re grateful because it taught us so much. Isn’t it weird to be grateful for the hard stuff?

If you want to hear more about how to be grateful for the hard things…like getting called huge and getting fired, you can click here.

Much love,

Jill and Kate

Tomorrow we are going to tell you about how we ended up in Vegas watching JLO do her thang. And her thang she did do.

Wickedly Powerful Words - Day 11 #31DaysOfBlogging

Remember a few days ago we told you about the DREAM BIG event that we went to in Nashville in March? Well we met a new friend there, Ginna Claire Mason, and her story blew us away. She grew up dreaming of playing Glinda the Good Witch in Wicked the musical on Broadway. When she was a kid, she saw the play and told her dad she was going to do that someday.

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GUYS, as if we need more proof, but WORDS HAVE POWER.

When we met Ginna Claire this year, she was, you guessed it, starring as Glinda on Broadway’s National Tour of Wicked. After we met her in Nashville, we started following her journey on Instagram and there was just something about her that drew us to her. She’s a giant LIGHT in this sometimes dark world, and we wanted to know her better. We also wanted you guys to know her better.

So we asked if she and Mary Kate Morissey, Ginna Claire’s BFF and the other star of Wicked (She plays Elphaba and is AMAZING) would be guests on our podcast. They are THE BEST and said yes, so we walkabouted our way right down to Tulsa to see them perform and interview them for our show. This fabulous duo has charisma for DAYS and they brought such wisdom and insight when we sat down and chatted with them in their dressing room before the show.

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We talked about friendship, what life is like on the road, living your literal dream, breaking up with your own life, and navigating the unknowns in life.

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We could keep telling you about this interview, (one of our most POPULAR shows of the season) or you could just go listen to it right now. Click here.

We feel so lucky to meet the people we get to meet on these journeys of ours. Ginna Claire and Mary Kate were two people we met this year very unexpectedly, and we could not be more grateful for their friendship and for all the wisdom we gleaned from them through this interview.

Tomorrow we’re going to circle back to what we learned from getting fired over someone calling Kate “HUGE” and how we are still learning from this experience.

Hope you have a wickedly wonderful Tuesday.

Hugs to you,

J&K

Global Girls Night - Day 10 #31DaysOfBlogging


“Do what you love, to fight what you hate.”

Those are words I heard my friend Jeremy say a couple years back and I loved it.


At the Dream Big event in March (which we told you about yesterday), we each got to dive into some dreams that we wanted to explore…and an idea that had been floating around my head the past 9 months was this idea called “Global Girls Night.”

THE IDEA FOR GLOBAL GIRLS NIGHT CAME IN 3 PARTS:

MY LOVE FOR GIRLS NIGHTS

+

THE MOVIE FIRST WIVES CLUB

+

KNOWING OF SO MANY INCREDIBLE NON-PROFITS I WANTED TO SUPPORT.


A little background...

I am a girl who loves her girlfriends. And I love a good girls night. Wine, cheese and comfy clothes with my best gals. As Amy Poehler says: YES PLEASE! My friends' typical-go-to girls night is exactly that: Come as you are. Sweatpants, dirty clothes, messy hair, heartbreaks, or good news etc. There is always wine (even if people are doing a weird cleanse or are preggo) and there is always cheese. We are a cheesy group (sorry, couldn't help myself.) Sometimes we are all watching a show together, so we gather to watch the next episode. Sometimes we just hang, and other times we play games. I love these women. They have laughed with me, cheered me on, cried with me, prayed for me, left me flowers at my door…they are the best. I am a better person because of each of them. They are a big reason why this idea came to life.

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I also got the idea for GGN from the plethora of girls nights I've attended in my life. I love catching up with my girlfriends, but sometimes I just felt so self-focused. I was going through a time in my life when I didn’t have any major life updates to share, and sometimes I would leave these girls nights feeling more lonely and isolated than before. Not because of my friends, but because of me. I wanted to contribute at these girls nights when I was going through a time in my life that seemed incredibly desolate on a personal level.

If you ask me what my top 5 movies are, somewhere near the top would be First Wives Club. Goldie Hawn, Bette Midler and Diane Keaton star in the comedy about women banding together. There is a line from the movie that has ALWAYS stuck out. My sister Amy and I quote it all the time. The line is: "... And then ... and then we go GLOBAL."

It got me thinking:

WHAT IF THERE COULD BE A GLOBAL GIRLS NIGHT?

MY FRIENDS AND I COMING TOGETHER TO CHANGE THE WORLD IN OUR SWEATS AND MESSY HAIR WITH BOTTLES OF WINE?

And that leads me to another thing. Most of the time, fundraisers are all fancy and black tie events —which I actually love - don't get me wrong. I adore getting all dressed up fancy-shmancy and busting a move on the dance floor. I am always up for that. But, at those events that I’ve attended, sometimes I’ve been at a table where I can afford to write a check for $25 dollars and the person next to me is writing a check for $10,000. It would sometimes make me feel badly about my donation, that it was insignificant or not enough.

I’ve always had a unique interest in non-profits. My dad started one when I was in high school (yes, it’s one of the ones we support—obviously!) but I got to see firsthand how far a $10 donation can actually go. Ten dollars can change someone's life in Africa. It’s hard to grasp sometimes, even for me, and I have actually witnessed it right in front of my own eyes. But I wanted to show that lots of small donations can actually make a HUGE difference.

And there isn’t just my Dad’s non-profit that I wanted to support. I have friends who lead and serve on so many incredible organizations—all that I love and believe in. They are changing the world...one life at a time. Whether it’s being rescued from sexual slavery or trafficking or learning kindness in schools or having access to clean water, these people are changing the world.

SO, I KNEW THERE WERE SO MANY WONDERFUL ORGANIZATIONS THAT I WANTED TO SUPPORT.

I WANTED A WAY TO HELP BRING AWARENESS AND SUPPORT TO ALL OF THEM.

GLOBAL GIRLS NIGHT WAS THE OPPORTUNITY TO COMBINE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS:

My girlfriends

(who I couldn’t survive without)

+

Wine

(which lets face it, I wouldn’t want to survive without)

+

The fact that women banded together in unity can make a global impact and change the world.

I sit at my laptop in my sweats with a glass of wine and have this crazy idea that I could change the world.

But I realize, I can’t.

But together…all of us together?

We can change people’s lives.

Since launching the idea in July, we’ve already done some incredible things together. I would love for you to check out www.globalgirlsnight.com and follow us on Instagram.

 Here’s a pic of a Global Girls Night in Nashville!

Here’s a pic of a Global Girls Night in Nashville!

And, HOST YOUR OWN GIRLS night! It’s so simple. We really can change the world together in our sweats and glasses of wine.

Tomorrow we are going to tell you about a random trip to Oklahoma and how everyone thought we interviewing Hanson but we had some other magic up our sleeves.

Love all of you world changers.
-Kate

Dream Big and Find Fellow Dreamers - Day 9 #31DaysOfBlogging

Our friend Bob Goff is a force for good on so many levels. You may have heard him speak, maybe you’ve read one of his books, or perhaps you’ve heard about the amazing work he does with Love Does all over the world helping kids get educated in high conflict zones like Afghanistan, Iraq, Somalia and more.

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Bob is by far the most interesting friend we have ever had, and he is someone who keeps us going whenever we feel stuck. He has this way of encouraging people, near and far, to just DO THE NEXT THING you need to do in life.

In March, we were lucky enough to join Bob and his Dream Big crew in Nashville for a 2 day inspiring event where everyone’s sole purpose was to dig into a dream they’ve been wanting to chase.

Some people wanted to start businesses, write books, change careers, or travel somewhere they’ve never been before. It’s amazing what happens when you put a bunch of people in a room together to talk about their DREAMS. They start to become a reality.

There were so many amazing people in this room, you guys. We have no clue how we end up in these places with inspiring people, but we are INCREDIBLY grateful for it. It was in that DREAM BIG room that we met our new friend Ginna Claire Mason (ahem, GLINDA from the National Tour of Wicked who was also on our podcast this year,) and oh, no big deal, but we also met our childhood idol, Amy Grant. Yeah, she was there too. We fumbled around for words upon being introduced to her, but no doubt that was a highlight of our year.

Here’s the bottom line:

During this 2 day event, some of our dreams started to rise to the surface. We’ll tell you more about what they are as this month goes on, but we wanted to share something we learned with you from our experience at this event.

Take every opportunity to be around people who inspire you.

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You are the sum total of the people you surround yourself with. So be picky and choosy about who gets your time. Look for people that are encouraging you to chase your dreams, who listen to your ideas, who hold space for the times when you feel like you want to quit. If you’re reading this and feeling frustrated that you know none of these sorts of folks…we have THE solution. Start being that person. Be the person that encourages others to chase their dreams, listen to other people’s ideas, hold space for times when they want to quit. Be who you are looking for. 

When you’re invited somewhere, show up and believe that anything could happen. Find people who talk about their DREAMS. Share your dreams out loud with someone, or with lots of people. When you start to say it out loud, it becomes closer and closer to becoming REAL. Dreams are made to be chased. People are made to connect.When you’re invited somewhere, show up and believe that anything could happen. Find people who talk about their DREAMS. Share your dreams out loud with someone, or with lots of people. When you start to say it out loud, it becomes closer and closer to becoming REAL. Dreams are made to be chased. People are made to connect.

Life is made to be lived, and lived to the FULLEST.

Tomorrow we’re going to tell you about the idea that we can change the world in our sweatpants.

Much love!

J&K

Take Care Of Yourself - Day 8 #31DaysOfBlogging

Today we wanted to share with you a little about a place where we each spent a week during our walkabout this year.

The place is called Onsite Workshops and it’s a therapeutic retreat center in Tennessee. We each learned so much, but Kate wrote a blog earlier this year sharing extensively about some of the things she learned. It is below, in case you missed it.

We have been learning the importance of mental health and that it is something we need to pay attention to and be gentle with. Onsite Workshops is a place where we were really able to do this. We even did a podcast interview with the CEO of Onsite, Miles Adcox, if you want to learn even more.

Here is Kate’s blog, below. Take care of yourself today. You are important.


I’m not sure where you were when you got the news that Kate Spade had ended her life.

For me, that news will be forever etched in my mind. I will always remember the patch of grass where I was standing, the feeling of the sun hitting my face as it was setting. The lump in my throat as I tried to swallow when I heard it was suicide. My stomach physically ached.  And not because I was a Kate Spade super-fan, but because I heard the news moments after receiving my phone back on June 7th after being away from all technology for a week. Let me back up.

Onsite.

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On June 1st, I drove myself about an hour outside of Nashville, Tennessee, to a place called Cumberland Furnace, TN to the Onsite Workshops. Onsite is a therapeutic retreat center and they have a week-long program called “The Living Centered Program,” or LCP. I’ve had a ton of friends who have gone through the program, who all had incredible experiences, but I never thought I would actually do it.

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See, I always thought of Onsite as a rehab type of place — like, you only go there for serious problems. But, after talking with my friend Miles who is the CEO at Onsite, and another friend Jess that works there, I had a better understanding that the program was really for anyone who wanted to take the next step. Anyone who wanted to become more emotionally healthy. A safe space to work on yourself and on your stuff. And that looks like all different things for different people. It’s really just a place for you to get emotionally fit.

So, with a little help and encouragement from my friends I said YES and signed up for the June 1st LCP. Honestly, part of me almost let fear win. Like, I almost didn’t say yes. I didn’t like the fact that I would be without a cell phone/computer and all the comforts of the outside world for a week — hello SEPARATION anxiety from my life. It was a real thing.  And another real fear was that the last 8 months I’ve really felt in an emotionally healthy place…or at least A LOT better than other times in my life…so I was a little worried that a week of intense group therapy was going to leave me in a worse place than before. But, I was able to talk that out with some of the Onsite staff, and they helped calm my fears and reassure me that it was a guided process — I wasn’t going to be alone with these fears.

So, June 1st came, and at around 7pm that evening, I handed over my cell phone. Guys, it was weird. I was excited to be free from it for a week, but I also immediately felt SO ALONE. I had none of my people with me. I couldn’t text Jill if I was having a melt-down. I couldn’t send a GIF to my girls if I needed a laugh. I couldn’t call my mom. I couldn’t insta-story and chat with all my insta-people. Solo. Me. Well, me surrounded by 56 strangers. Yikes.

I’m not going to share the details of all that we did, but it was a combination of mornings spent with the big group — learning more about the science behind why we do what we do…sort of like emotional fitness classes, and then the late mornings and afternoons were spent in your small group of about 8 or 9 other individuals, and that’s when the more focused work would happen…in group therapy.

I am not even going to lie — I thought the idea of group therapy was terrible. I mean, I knew that was the thing that LCP did, but I’ve never done group therapy and I was certain I would hate it. But, OMG, it was magic. These 9 people started out as strangers, and I can tell you right now, there’s not one of them I wouldn’t fly across the country for in one hot second right now. These strangers became like family. Six days. What in the world?

I’m not even sure how to fully summarize what changes I feel in myself, but it feels significant. And full disclosure, I definitely had some personal a-ha moments that I want to keep for myself or family/close friends, but I do really want to share some of my takeaways with you in hopes that they might be useful to you. They might be jumbled or random but here’s the bottom line.

I loved it. I feel like I learned tools that will help me navigate the rest of my life. I feel like I experienced real healing in some wounds that I was carrying since childhood. I would highly recommend the program to anyone who has blood running through their veins. I think anyone and everyone could benefit. Literally there were people there from ages 19 to mid-70s. Anyone can do this.

Group Therapy.

So, you’re in a small group, where everyone has signed a confidentiality agreement and you have a therapist who is the guide for your group and you get to know these people. Like, KNOW them. As you share your story and as they share theirs, something begins to shift inside of you. You cannot look someone in the eyes when they’re talking about their pain and not be changed. My therapist group leader told me that 70% of your healing comes from just being in the room — the 30% is when you’re talking about your own stuff, but that might not even be as impactful. And I realized something…that might be the key. I think that’s what we’re all looking for in life. Someone to bear witness to our pain. We don’t need someone to fix it. Or say it’s going to be fine. Or pity us. We just need someone to see it. Someone to bear witness to our pain. Especially if the pain happened a long time ago, to go back, to uncover those painful moments and have a room full of people witness it. There is healing in that.

I am a fixer by nature. I want to rescue and fix and make a plan for change to get out of pain. Yet, that was not my role —in group therapy or in life — my role is to say, I see you in that pain. Maybe that’s it. Just, I see it. I am a witness to your pain…and I’m sorry. You take 57 strangers, and you realize that every single person there is carrying pain of some sort. Wounds. Hurt. Heartache. Some of them are scars that run deep. Some are fresh and still oozing with infection. But pain is pain. I left there and I swear I was seeing people differently. The cashier at Kroger. The guy flipping burgers at Five Guys. Every single human alive has a story and most likely has pain. It makes me want to listen more. I don’t need to fix or rescue. I need to listen and see people. I need to bear witness to their pain. It’s powerful.

It was intense.

They say the week there is equivalent to 8 months of weekly therapy. So, it’s no walk in the park. At times, it was uncomfortable…pushing me out of my comfort zone and into feelings that I haven’t felt in a while. Was it a breeze? No. Was it worth it? Yes. Because here’s the thing: I’m pretty certain that great things come after a bit of friction. Sometimes sitting in the group room, I felt uncomfortable and it felt hard. I think of it now like fire or friction. No one likes fire, but that’s how you get the refined beauty. No one likes the friction on the rock until the diamond appears. And I don’t mean it to be a cheesy analogy, but I mean it. It reminded me that most things in life that are worth it take work, and sometimes that work is uncomfortable in the process.


You aren’t allowed to talk about what you do for work. That is a true story. You arrive and you are given a name tag. Kate R. — that was all of me. You guys, I’ve been a part of the duo Jill and Kate for 15 freaking years. Do you know how awesome it was for people to get to know me? Me. Not “Kate” from Jill and Kate...or Kate the back-up singer for Kelly Clarkson. Me! Just me! This part was so helpful.  Literally, there are people that don’t know the difference between Jill and I, and honestly they don’t care to. When showing up at an event on my own people will ask me: “So, how are you guys?” Ummm…it’s just me here.

I felt seen.

This kind of piggy backs on my last point — but during my week at Onsite, I felt seen. I sort of think you can’t escape that. Seen, known, and loved. I think someone summarized those things that might be our three most basic desires and longings. I wasn’t known for accomplishments or seen because of what I did for work. I was seen as a human being not a human doing.

Also, I realized that so much of my life is work. And I love it — I love all that I get to do, but when people aren’t allowed to talk about work — you talk about who you are. Sometimes around the meal tables there would be awkward lulls in conversation because the natural flow of conversation NORM is to talk about work. Instead, I found myself asking the question “Do you have any hobbies? What do you do for fun?” A lot. It was awesome because you actually get to know people for who they are, not what they do. Yes, yes, yes. I’m trying to do this more. My way of asking people questions is now, “So what keeps you busy when you’re not {at the event or driving for Uber}?”

Another huge takeaway for me was that my job is to look after myself. Not in a “Only lookout for #1” way or a selfish manner at all, but that my role in life is taking care of and nurturing myself. I cannot control anyone else or any other situation, but I can take care of myself. A lot of my nature is to caretake — which my therapist also pointed out the difference between care-taking and caregiving. That care-taking is way more about you than it is the other person. Ummm…say what? Thanks Jim for the mic drop moment. Taking vs. giving. Dang, that was a lightbulb moment for me. But I realized that self-care is something that I need to focus on.

Meditation and the brain.

So here’s the deal. I have always heard meditating is good for you. I sort of thought it was more in the New Age vein, but heck, even the Bible talks about meditating…but I’ve never really done it, because I thought that it was something to do for fun or for spiritual reasons. During one of the morning sessions, they do a whole lecture about meditating and show you scientific scans of brains and meditation. I will not attempt to regurgitate medical information here, but let’s just say I now try to meditate every single morning. It’s like flossing but for your brain. Do it, do it, do it. I downloaded a few free apps that have guided mediations: Calm, Headspace and Simple Habit. So far, I like Calm the best.

I am so incredibly grateful for my time at Onsite. To the people that read this that spent the week with me — you know who you are, and I am so grateful to have you with me on my journey from here on out. To the ones who got me to Onsite — Jess, Miles and all the other friends I texted for advice — thank you! I am a different person because of you.

And to you, reader, who might be feeling scared or stuck or in need of the next step…reach out for help. If it’s a friend or a therapist or counselor or a week at Onsite — don’t underestimate the healing power of sharing your pain with others — that’s what we all need — we need a witness to the pain.

And so, I think that’s why the news of Kate Spade hit me so hard.

She was seen and known by billions of people. Had success. Money. Fame. But did she feel truly seen? Truly known? Truly loved. Did she need someone to bear witness to her pain? I don’t know and I never will. But hearing the news of her death was the punctuation mark to my week at Onsite that made it forever memorable.

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My hope for you, dear reader, is that you feel seen, known and loved.

Much love,

Kate







When Hope Feels Far Away - Day 7 #31DaysOfBlogging

One of the hardest things to face is the feeling of hopelessness, and finding yourself down in the depths of the darkness.

We have been really open with our bouts dealing with depression and anxiety, and just the general feeling of being really low. Our walkabout journey has been incredible — full of life-giving adventures and excitement and beauty and all of these amazing things, but for each of us, this year also held a pretty big emotional breakdown.

We aren’t talking about just a little “Oh I’m feeling down” moment. We both faced the “In-bed-crying-our-eyes-out” for reals funk. The funk where you find it hard to see any hope in or see any future in.

And I think that’s where it gets you. That feeling of hopelessness. The voices of anxiety and fear that tell you it’ll never change. The thought that good things aren’t going to come your way. The lies that fill your head telling you you’re alone…..that change is not possible and that this darkness will stick around for good.

Ughhhh….it’s so heavy. Even typing about it now, it brings us back to the low point we both faced. If you are feeling that way right now, we want to share a few things with you.

It’s okay to feel all you are feeling.

We get it. We’ve been there. And we’ll probably be there again in the future. But, instead of trying to get yourself out of it right away, let yourself feel it. Cry. Lie in bed. Feel it. Cry about it. It’s okay to feel all that you’re feeling.

Know that it won’t last forever.

Things will change. Even though the voices in your head are trying to tell you that they won’t — seasons change and this darkness won’t last forever.

Sometimes it’s just helpful to hear that you aren’t alone and that’s why you need to listen to this episode: Digging Out Of The Breakdown.

You are not alone, and you are loved. It’s okay to ask for help.

We both needed some help this year. Tomorrow we’ll tell you about the week we each spent at Onsite — the therapeutic retreat center in Tennessee.

Xo

J&K

Behind The Scenes with Podcast Guests - Day 6 #31DaysOfBlogging

When we decided to start our podcast, we made a “dream list” of guests we would love to have on the show to interview. GUYS, almost all of them said YES! We only have a few left on our original list that we still would love to have on the show, but we realized we need to UPDATE THE LIST with some new dream guests!

Honestly though, each and every one of these guests were amazing to have on the show.  One thing we loved is that we did each and every interview IN REAL LIFE. That’s pretty rare for podcasts these days. That was part of the beauty of the ability to travel this year. We joined people in their living rooms, dressing rooms, basements, offices….and sometimes in whatever hotel or Airbnb we were staying in at the time.

We thought it would be fun to give you a little bit more of a behind the scenes peek into some of the interviews we were fortunate to have this season. Here’s a little tidbit we remember that we think you might enjoy.

Ben Higgins

The night before the interview, we went to Ben’s coffee company’s (Generous Coffee) launch party. We had SO MUCH fun at the event and may or may not have celebrated with a few margaritas that may or may not have ended at a karaoke bar singing karaoke with some new friends. This was good times, sunshine. Yet, we did not make it to bed until ummm after 3:00AM, and the margaritas, along with the altitude, along with very little sleep, made it a wee bit of a rough morning for the ‘ole J&K. We held it together and decided that the perfect thing to bring to a morning podcast interview were DONUTS! So, we took an Uber to a donut shop, then to Ben’s house, and he made us some of the best coffee (thank you Generous Coffee) ever. That totally cured us from our somewhat hungover state, and we had some good laughs about it on the episode, which you can hear here. (Also, shout out to Mr. Higgins for being our first ever podcast guest. He set the bar for sure.)


Ally Fallon

Something funny about Ally’s episode is that we were in Nashville at an apartment that we were subletting, and Ally and our other friend Betsy came over — we got talking and catching up so much that we almost missed our window of recording! Ally had SUCH WISDOM about life and comparison — it’s still something we think about frequently. She is just so great, and her new book is a MUST READ. You can hear her episode here.


Whitney English

We always have epic times with Whitney. She’s a friend of ours that adventures with us and we love that about her. She is always down to road trip, meet up at some conference or event, or just hang out wherever and talk about the deep things in life. After this episode, we had some amazing bacon at First Watch that had pepper and maple syrup, and for some reason, that bacon really sticks out when we think about this episode. HA! Whitney is wise, deep, and one of the most genuine people we know. Listen to her episode here.

Charles Esten

This episode was recorded at Chip’s house in his basement. We are such big fans of Chip’s whole family. When we recorded this episode, Chip’s mom was there visiting for his big Opry show that was the next day. We were so grateful he still took the time to chat with us even though he had so much going on. He’s just such a great human, you guys. Before the episode, we chatted in Chip’s kitchen with his wife Patty and his mom, and we talked a lot about the 4 Things Totes that we had with us, discussing how hard it is to choose 4 words to put on those bags! Listen to our episode with Chip here!


Miles Adcox

We headed out to Onsite in somewhat rural Tennessee to meet up with Miles to record this episode. We met him at his office and then drove over to a separate building adjacent to the Onsite property. Well, it’s only about a 2 minute drive, but there was a truck that had caught on fire right by the entrance to the property. It was scary to see! People were there, keeping it under control, but we took a long way around to go record the podcast, and on our way back, we passed the truck again and it was completely burned out. Luckily no one was hurt, but it was quite a sight. Not a great day for that truck driver. Miles shared his wisdom with us and you don’t want to miss this conversation.


Hunter Hayes

We arrived at Hunter’s house in Nashville with a huge greeting from his adorable dogs. Guys, they stole the show. They wanted to hang with us and be right in the mix. At one point, one was right up on the couch with us...we think she wanted to share about what she did when life didn’t go the way she planned! Hunter is one of the most down to earth genuine guys around, and his dogs are pretty darn cute too. Listen to his episode here.


Ginna Claire Mason and Mary Kate Morrissey

This was our first backstage interview of the season, and the ambiance was just so incredible. The girls had their dressing rooms so magically decorated and they were just THE best hosts. They had wine and popcorn for us all (coconut water for them) and we felt right at home. From the minute we walked in the stage door, these girls felt like old long lost friends. MK gave us a little stuffed avocado (yes, it sounds weird but true) that we have brought with us everywhere since. These girls are THE BEST. Listen here.

Jann Arden

Before we recorded with Jann, she asked us to come up and sing Nashville during her show that night. We went and soundchecked and then came back to her dressing room to record the episode. We laughed and laughed because the toilet kept running in the bathroom next door. Jann is just so funny and we were hoping we could keep it together. Her dog Midi joined us for the episode too. Our conversation with Jann was like many conversations we’ve had with her before, but we were lucky enough to record this one so we can have it forever. Love her so much. Listen to Jann’s episode here.

Window or Aisle? - Day 5 #31DaysOfBlogging

Guys…

We have pretty much become the most loyal Southwest Airlines passengers anyone can find. We have added to our work bucket list to play one of their 35,000 feet concerts, and if we ever make it into the Southwest Magazine we might literally die, because OMG — we heart SWA so much.

We have gotten in DEEP y’all. DEEP.

We have the credit card, we are proud holders of drink coupons, and we JUST GOT THE COMPANION PASS. Can we get an Amen? (The companion pass is a loyalty program reward where you get to have someone fly FREE with you for an entire year. It’s like a 2 for 1 deal but on AIRLINE TICKETS. Is there anything better? Chelllllooooooo — NO.

See, on Southwest there are no assigned seats, which means that on a not-totally-full-flight you have the potential of having a seat empty next to you. Soooo…Jill and I have pretty much perfected the art of keeping the middle seat between us free.

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I, Kate am a LOYAL window seat person. (This is actually where I’m sitting right now as I type…it’s my favorite spot to write.)

I love me a good window seat. Jill is a loyal aisle type of girl. She likes her space. So, when we board a plane, I go for the window and Jill takes the aisle, and then we try and keep the middle seat empty.  

We have pretty much become experts on their boarding process and here are our two top techniques for keeping the middle seat empty:

  • Put food in the middle seat. The messier looking food the better. Open a to-go box full of greasy looking fries and a burger and noooooooo one is going to want to sit there. If you can be eating while passengers are boarding it works like a charm.

  • Leave a purse or bag in the seat and lean over it talking to each other. You sort of cover up the fact that there is even a middle seat to be taken. If you let out a good fake cough at this point that’s another sure thing to have people passing you by.

Please do the above at all times while avoiding eye contact with every single person.

If you’re tempted to see who else is walking down the aisle…don’t do it. Avert your eyes. Once people see your compassionate looking eyes while searching for a seatmate, you will be TOAST.

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I don’t know where we first heard this, because it definitely wasn’t our genius idea, but we heard someone once say that they got a fake book jacket cover that read “How to Share Your Faith On A plane” and held it up so people would see that and just pass him by. That’s some funny stuff right there.


But let us just be clear on why we have left all other airlines behind. You can change your flight 10 minutes before take-off without losing your money. Ummm helllooooo? For two traveling “walkabouters” this provides the perfect amount of flexibility for us. Plus, you always get 2 checked bags for FREE. That’s ZERO dolla dolla bills you guys. Say what? Plus they send you drink coupons for free drinks and what is better than a free cocktail or glass of wine while you are looking out of that window??

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We tell you more about our tips and tricks of keeping the middle seat empty and about the SWA flight that took us to NYC to a fun party where we danced the night away with Cindy Crawford. Yeah, you read that correctlyyou can listen here.

Tomorrow we are going to tell you some of the behind the scenes moments from our biggest podcast guests of the season.

What did we buy before our interview with Lauren Graham? What did we bring to Ben Higgins for our interview? We dish on all of this and more tomorrow.

Xoxo Gossip Girl

(JUST KIDDING, had to.)

Still Small Voice - Day 4 #31DaysOfBlogging

You guys. We are already four days into the month guys…are you having fun yet? We are LOVING sharing these blogs with you and are so happy that you guys are here for it.

Side note: When did the phrase “HERE FOR IT” get so popular? This was definitely a 2018 thing, right? Either way…we are HERE FOR IT. Hahaha…see what we did there?

Anyway, we wanted to share one of the biggest things we’ve learned on the walkabout this past year. It’s this:

Your gut feeling is hardly ever wrong, and it’s probably trying to tell you something.

Tuning into our gut feeling is something that we’ve really worked hard at over the last few years. It’s that still small voice that informs your decisions, and what we’ve been learning is that the only way to grow and tune into that gut feeling more is to do two things:

Get quiet and start listening.


The gut feeling can often be referred to as a “still small voice” inside of us. It can be found on both small and large scales. Maybe it’s something small like, “Take the long way home tonight,” or, “Cross the street now, the person approaching you on your side of the sidewalk is giving you a weird feeling.” And sometimes it’s bigger things. “Don’t get into business with this person,” or “You need to breakup with him.” But either way, in the small and big things, we’ve really tried to get better at listening to that intuitive voice inside of us. Getting into quiet spaces, without our phones, without distraction has been super helpful in growing the ability to hear the voice.

After you hear it, you need to be able to trust it…which brings us to our next point:

Act on it and be okay with not having a “logical” reason for your decision.

Once you start tuning into your gut feeling and your still small voice gets clearer, you’ll need to start taking action when you hear it. Don’t be surprised if your rational mind starts telling you that you need a logical reason or “proof” to act on it.  That’s natural. And here’s the deal. You just need to start trusting it. Sometimes you will get it wrong, and that’s a-okay, but the more you exercise this, the more often you will get it right and start to really know yourself.

We talked about some other ways of how to grow your intuitive voice and gut feeling here — we hope that it helps you in your journey to be fully tuned into that voice.

We also wrote a song about it — it’s called “Soft Voice” and here’s a video of us sitting in our living room playing it.

We believe in you.

You have a gut feeling.

It’s that still small voice.

Find it. Trust it.

See you tomorrow.

J&K

Dare To Dive Into The Unknown - Day 3 #31DaysofBlogging

At the end of 2017, we got a call from a friend of ours in California asking if we’d be willing to give a TEDx talk on February 2nd out in Westlake Village, CA.

Ehhhh…HOLD THE PHONE. A TEDx talk?

Um, YES, we would be willing, we said, and then we went, “Holy crap, WE HAVE TO WRITE A TED TALK NOW.”


It was really more like “We GET to write a TED TALK now,” but there was definitely a bit of pressure that we suddenly felt. Knew we needed this kind of confidence (LOL):

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At the same time, we felt like maybe this was just the time and we were ready for it. We put our thinking caps on, over-thought it a lot, and came back to the basics...we needed to just tell our story and what we’ve learned from it...

…because all of our stories matter, and if we can help just one person by sharing our story — it’s 100% worth it.

We had never really spoken to an audience in this capacity before and we were excited to take on the challenge. We flew out to LA at the end of January and got in front of the audience of over 1000. We were really just at the start of our “Walkabout” during this time, and did our best to be honest about not knowing what was coming next, but encouraging people to be brave enough to dive into the unknown and just see what happens. Here is a pic of Jill warming up in the hotel room right before we headed over to the venue:

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There’s really not a better way to tell you about it than just to show it you — so, here is our TEDx talk about taking a leap and heading into the unknown:

If you want to hear more about our TEDx adventures in LA and how Mario Lopez fits into our TEDx experience (LOL), here’s where you can hear more: TEDx, Mario Lopez, and The Super Bowl.

Tomorrow we’re going to tell you about one of the most important things we’ve learned since starting the walkabout. And it might be different than what you think…

See ya tomorrow.

J&K

You Just Need To START - Day 2 #31DaysofBlogging

Welcome back! Last summer when we decided it was time for a BIG change, we knew that it had to be physical and creative. Part of getting “unstuck” for us was setting out to do life-giving things. Travel and talking to people are two life-giving things for both of us.

For years and years we had talked about starting a podcast, but in line with everything else during that season, we felt just stuck enough that we never pulled the trigger on it.

When we decided to sell everything, start a walkabout, and get unstuck, we knew this was just the time to start the podcast we had always dreamed about starting.

There were so many questions to address: What would we talk about? Would we have guests? How would we record it? Could we do this ourselves? Do we have the time? Will we be able to talk that much? Okay, who are we kidding. We knew that at least Kate could talk enough for the both of us to make this work. HAHA. (Jill found her podcast voice too, though.)


We have learned along the way...heck, we are still learning along the way. But here are some of the major things we learned from doing this.

1. Sometimes you just have to START.

You will fail. You will be slow at first. You will like parts of it and not like other parts. Sometimes you’ll feel like a winner and sometimes like a loser. But you will never know if you never try.

2. People are people.

This was the name of our second episode, and it’s been one of our big takeaways from this new adventure in podcasting. We asked some people who we thought would NEVER say yes to being a guest on our show. We thought things like, “They’re too busy. They’re too big for this. They don’t need to do it.”

But guys, people are people, whether they are famous, busy, happy, sad, successful, struggling. People are people. We all share similarities because we’re human. We feel pain, we feel joy, we long for things, and we need each other and each other’s stories.

3. Life doesn’t go the way we plan it, pretty much ever.

This was the question we asked every guest, the topic we tied into each episode, “What to do when life doesn’t go the way you planned.” Guess what? Life doesn’t go the way we plan it, but we have the ability to adjust, choose joy, contentment, peace, and figure out the next step.

This experience creating our podcast has been better than we ever expected. We can’t wait to keep it going, keep learning new things every week, and sharing life with you guys. Thank you for listening, for texting/calling us, and for encouraging us along the way.

Are you needing a little boost to just START something? Click here to listen to the VERY FIRST episode we EVER recorded. It might just be the motivation you need to start. Leave a comment and let us know what you’re trying…we love hearing your ideas and adventures. We really believe that once you put action behind something, things just start to unfold.

Tomorrow we’ll tell you more about the invitation that scared us to death but we knew we had to say a giant YES to.

Love y’all.

J&K

PS. Don’t forget to sign up for your Christmas card from us. You’ve only got 6 more days to sign up — don’t miss out! Click here to give us your mailing address.

You Are Not Alone - Day 1 #31DaysofBlogging

It’s December 1st, which means that it’s time to kick off #31DaysofBlogging :) Woohoo! This is one of our favorite traditions that we’ve started because it causes us to look back at the year behind us and get excited for the new year ahead. We love writing and using this blog to share thoughts, stories, recipes, etc. with you. So, bookmark this page because for the next 30 days, we will be posting a new blog every day and you don’t want to miss any of the fun!

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With all of the holiday celebrations already in full swing, we wanted to make sure that you were aware of a couple things:

We want to send you a Christmas card and you have 7 more days to get your address to us.

Just click here, fill out your address, and voila … a Christmas card shall appear in your mailbox. A real, handwritten card from yours truly.  Can I get an AMEN for fun mail and not another bill…AMIRIGHT? AMEN and AMEN. No strings attached. It’s just our way of thanking you for being an amazing community/tribe. So, whatcha waiting for?

The holidays can be hard. We totally get it. Whether you are in the middle of a tense relationship, find yourself experiencing a new loss, or just personal reasons have got you feeling down in the dumps, the holidays can just feel extra hard.

There can also be a lot of expectation that you bring to the table during the holidays — you thought things would look different by now or you were hoping for a different outcome and you find yourself in the same place. Honestly, we have both been there. Part of why we started the walkabout was because we were feeling so stuck that we knew we had to do something drastic to get out of the “stuck-ness.” I remember saying, “I just don’t want to show up for Christmas in the exact same state that I did last year. Something has to change.” So, last year, we sold everything and spent 2018 on a “walkabout.”

We’ll tell you more about that tomorrow, but if you are feeling super alone right now, we invite you to listen to this song - Tired of Being Alone — and know that you are not alone.

Tomorrow we’ll tell you more about our journey of getting unstuck. Until then, know you’re loved and not alone. Leave a comment if you need an extra boost this holiday season.

Much love,

J&K

Cancel All Your Plans

I want you to cancel all your plans.

Okay, not really. But the holidays can be a time where you make a million grand plans in your mind and you arrive with expectations GALORE and sometimes those grand plans get ruined...and you end up bawling your eyes out in the bathroom. (Been there, done that. True story.)

So, I have 2 ideas that I want to share with you for a radically marvelous holiday week — both of these things we are practicing and have helped us both so much.

  • Drop all your expectations. That’s right. I read this somewhere: “Expectation is the root of all heartache,” and I about lost all my cool because that was 100% me. I was flying through every day with high expectations and I found myself constantly disappointed.

At first, I thought that not having expectations would leave me in this constant womp-womp state, but I decided that I would allow myself to keep one expectation, and one that would not leave me disappointed. The one expectation I keep is that I will enjoy myself. Why is that so easy for me to keep? Because I can control that! Can I control what Aunt Sally says to me? NOPE. Can I control if no one wants to take the perfectly posed family photo? NOPE. Can I control if Uncle Ed cuts me off every single time I talk? NOPE. But what I can control is my attitude and my feelings. I can choose to enter the day by setting the only expectation I can manage: I will enjoy myself today. That’s pretty much most of what I can control, myself and my attitude.

  • Decide that you are not going to change anyone’s opinions about anything. Decide you will just listen. Really listen. Not argue your points. Not tell everyone why they are wrong. Not why “your side” is better. Just listen. Be present. Remind yourself of your above commitment to enjoy yourself. Part of that is not getting yourself wrapped up in conversations that are going to be tense. You are not Joan of Arc, no need to ride into battle. Allow yourself to just BE. Sometimes we think that by not speaking up or arguing a different viewpoint, it’s signifying that we agree with that person. Not true at all. You can listen and still hold differing opinions without needing to argue them right then and there.

So there you have it, two rules to live by this Thanksgiving, if you so choose. I will do my best to do this, and whatever happens, know that I can enjoy myself. I really believe this method works.

If you need an extra reminder on changing your attitude, we gotchu. Click here.

Oh, and one more thing...the whole point of this holiday, to be honest...BE THANKFUL. Even in all of our struggles, hardships, and disappointments, we have so much to be thankful for, and I never want to miss that.

We are thankful for YOU, for your support, and for navigating this crazy life with each of you reading this. Here’s to a great Thanksgiving!

Much love,

Kate

PS. Here are a few appetizers + a cocktail we are making tomorrow!

Cranberry Brie Bites

Bacon & Cheese Stuffed Mushrooms

Maple Old Fashioned


What are you whipping up?

New Year Wishes

Guys, if you’re reading this, you’ve made it through another year! You have most likely faced peaks and valleys, joy and sorrow, ease and difficulty, love and loss...all since December 31, 2016. Isn’t it amazing what can take place in one year?

As we all look forward to starting a new year together, we want to send you these well wishes.

May you laugh more often and uncontrollably.

May you live in each moment and recognize the magic of the present.

May you find great strength during difficulties, and conquer fear and anxiety with immeasurable peace.

May you sing and dance more.

May you check things off your bucket lists.

May you spend more time with the people you love.

May you never give up on the deep desires of your soul.

May life be kind to you, and may you be kind to others.

May you see beauty in a way you have never seen it before.

May God bless you and your loved ones.
 

Thank you for sticking with us for another year. We can’t wait for 2018, when we will bring you some new music, new podcast episodes, new blogs, and we will all learn about life together.

Your support means everything to us.

Much love,

J&K

PS. One more: May you drive immediately to the ocean whenever possible :)

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